February 17, 2009

SHAKEN NOT STIRRED

This week has been kind of hard for me. I started to feel that old familiar spiritual laziness coming on. Like maybe I've taken the 'be still' part a little too far.

I couldn't motivate myself to get out of bed thirty minutes early for quiet time. I let my conversation with God wane. I turned away in situations in which I should have immediately turned to Him. It was easier not to listen; easier to do it my way. And I started to feel guilty and discouraged because, Why can't I do this? Why do I fall so quickly? Why is it so hard for me to commit?

But, then He shook me. While I was just sitting there being still, He grabbed me and said Get up, it's time to Move.

That's when I realized what was happening.

Satan is fighting hard for me.

When I focus on God, Satan focuses on me. He preys on my weaknesses in a very real way. So much so that I can describe in detail his attacks of the past week. That may sound like a bunch of ballyhoo if you don't believe Satan is a real and powerful force. But I believe. I believe Satan schemes and breeds selfishness and ego, a need for power and control, judgment and self-righteousness. He will do anything to make me turn my back on God, to keep me from focusing on God and communion with Him.

As always, my Father came to my rescue and said I better wise up to the enemy's tactics, lest he sink my battleship. (side note: Have I mentioned God's grace? That although I screw up, He still wants me?)

I am reminded again that giving myself up completely is the only way to be saved. If I'm truly going to grow and walk this path with God for the rest of my life, I have to learn to be strong in my stand against Satan. Because Satan will never give up. But his attacks will be less effective once I truly put on the armor of God and rely solely on HIS strength, His word, His truth, His Peace. Not my own.

Here's what I'm currently contemplating:
The Armor of God
10Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. 12For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. 14Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, 15and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. 16In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. 17Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. 18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.
Ephesians 6:10-18

Goals from last week:
  • Get up every morning for quiet time before work. I think I covered this at the beginning of the post.
  • Seek a new verse to memorize and meditate on.
  • Continue reading The Practice of the Presence of God.

Goals for this week:
  • Get up every morning for quiet time before work. - This would be the Move part
  • Contemplating Ephesians 6:10-18
  • Continue reading The Practice of the Presence of God.
  • C.S. Lewis has some interesting things to say about the giving up of self, I'll be looking through my books to recall his words of wisdom

Selah.

3 comments:

Darrell said...

You always say it so well - and right on target - almost as if your getting some "insider" insight from somewhere.
Dad

Alison said...

My husband has several C.S. Lewis books...is there any one in particular that you recommend to start with?

Scatter Sunshine said...

Hi Alison! Thanks for stopping by! Mere Christianity is probably my favorite C.S. Lewis book. He tackles some tough issues and raises some interesting questions. The Screwtape Letters would be next on my list. I'd love to hear what you think, if you check them out.