happy thoughts

oatmeal. playing on Granny’s porch in the summer. Olympic emotions. love songs. spending the day with my precious niece. snowy landscape making a familiar drive dreamy and new. cousins giggling. sister as hairdresser. paper hearts. new adventures. stretching. long drives together. polka dot jammies. the hiding game. sharing clothes. bread baking. a new cookbook. love stories. finding courage. Temple Grandin. chocolate cake. Mario Kart. naps. toddlers’ talking. quiet time. the perfect cup of coffee. dance party. giving something up. funny text messages. sunrise. cards in the mail. sewing. un-conforming. planning a garden. paper heart crafts. old photos. reminiscing. reconnecting. remembering...

note to self

Oh self, how this world tempts me to control!
To curl finger tips to palm and dig in with self-centeredness, pride, foolish wisdom;
clench fists tightly around darkness.

Oh self, give it up!

When my hands are closed, so it is with my heart.

He laid open his palms for the greatest sacrifice, the ultimate act of love;
then reached out, offering scars so others would believe.

Oh self, give it up!

Father, I have sinned.
Held fast to this need for control;
Lived blindly with the illusion that I could control what is yours;
Given myself freely to it, and bound up with the enemy;
These hands, this heart, closed, unable to truly receive you,
How many opportunities have I missed to wash feet?

Yet, I come now, under merciful grace,
press palms together,
now lay open wide,
offer myself freely to you, a living sacrifice.

Oh self, give it up, this prison of worldly control,
uncurl fingers to find the key,
hold light in your hands,
and live in the freedom of open.

tweet tweet

I read this today and thought it was just so lovely I had to share.

Faith is the bird that feels the light and sings when the dawn is still dark.
~Tagore

WE HAVE BLUE EYES

Have I ever told you, dear Internet, about the day this sweet girl was born?

My brother called me around 1 a.m. to tell me they were at the hospital. I was five hours away, and it was sleeting… so it was decided I ought not leave and drive five hours in the middle of the night on icy roads. So I waited as patiently as I could, pacing with excitement, taking a shower and packing my bag, calling my Mom for updates… Finally, 6 a.m. rolled around, the hour I would leave. About five minutes before I was to walk out the door, my Mom called… she was standing outside the delivery room… the baby was close, so close… then she said, It's here! We can hear it crying, it's here, it's here!

I completely broke down. I could hear my Dad laughing with joy… a few moments later my brother poked his head out to announce, "We got ourselves a little girl." I will never forget that moment. In one instant I was overwhelmed with total joy, and completely devastated that I wasn't there.

I was a mess. I thought for sure I was going to feel a huge weight of regret for the rest of my life that I was not standing in that waiting room the moment my first niece was born. I wanted to BE there, I wanted to see my brother's face as he became a father…

Five hours later I was holding the sweetest little baby I had ever known. I was an aunt. The feelings of regret I was so sure I would carry forevah seemed silly… here she was, just hours old, and I was getting to hold her, and hug my brother, and sit by Andrea with complete gratefulness for what she'd made me a part of.

I think about that early morning now and laugh at how emotional and dramatic I was. Can you hear me? ForEVER, I'm going to regret it foreeeevvveeeer.

Oh, my sweetest niece, I'm glad we both like polka dot jammies. You make me smile foreeeeevveeer.

PRIDENESS

This little girl makes me proud to be an American, and so proud to be her Aunt.

{Thanks for the video, Andrea.}

THE BEST PART OF WAKING UP

photo via

Does anyone else get teary eyed over Folgers commercials?

You know, the classic where Peter comes home from college at Christmas. Or the 2009 version where the brother comes home from West Africa and his sister says "you're my present this year." Which, actually, is a little bit creepy. That one doesn't really make me teary.

But the one with the dancers makes me want to get up and stretch gracefully then clog around with extreme purpose... dundada dundada DUN!

I saw one I haven't seen before, where a young girl tells her dad she's engaged, and he says her fiance is a lucky man. They sip their coffee, then he glances at her with that sideways "Dads always know" look, and adds "I told him the same thing when we talked last week."

Oh Folgers, you really are the best part of waking up.

2010: Year of the Jump

1. Jump for joy
2. Jump in with both feet
3. There's always more after the Jump
4. If you don't like where you land, Bounce
5. Rely on your safety net
6. Hold hands and skip
7. Expect the bungee effect now and then
8. Careful not to jump around too much
9. Hold the rope sometimes so others can jump
10. Become good at jumping hurdles
11. Higher! Higher!

Life is like a trampoline, you gotta jump on it.
~Angela